The Surprising Experience of Being Gay at Sandals
Updated: Sep 16
I put off booking Sandals for years, and the reason was the map.
The brand builds on islands that have historically criminalized men like me. Not "unwelcoming" in the vague way travel writing uses that word, but actual statutes with actual prison terms attached. It felt like a strange thing to sell to my own community, so for a long time I didn't.
Then I went to Saint Lucia to see it myself, and came home having had one of the more relaxing weeks I've had anywhere.
And since that trip, the single thing I was most uncomfortable about has changed.
Saint Lucia Decriminalized
In July 2025 the High Court of Saint Lucia struck down the buggery and gross indecency provisions of the Criminal Code. Those sections carried up to ten years. The ruling covers consensual same-sex intimacy between adults in private, and the court went further than it had to, saying plainly that criminalizing the conduct is what produces the stigma, the harassment, and the violence around it.
Saint Lucia now sits alongside Antigua and Barbuda, Barbados, Dominica, and Saint Kitts and Nevis, all of which have decriminalized in the last few years. Grenada, Guyana, Jamaica, Saint Vincent and the Grenadines, and Trinidad and Tobago still have their laws on the books, and the courts in Saint Vincent and Trinidad both rejected challenges recently.
For a resort week the practical difference is small, because nobody was enforcing those laws against tourists inside an all-inclusive anyway. What it changes is the thing underneath: the reason I hesitated in the first place. The sentence I would have had to write in 2021, that you're vacationing somewhere your relationship is a crime, isn't true of Saint Lucia anymore.
One thing decriminalization is not
It isn't marriage.
Saint Lucia struck down a criminal law. It didn't create a right to marry, and neither did Barbados, Antigua, Dominica, or Saint Kitts. If you're planning a wedding rather than a vacation, that's a different question with a different answer, and I get to it further down.
What Sandals Actually Is
Seventeen resorts across eight islands and countries, all adults only, all couples only, all all-inclusive. Jamaica has the most of them. Saint Lucia has three. The newer additions are Curaçao and Saint Vincent.
Same-sex couples are welcome at all of them and have been for years. That's the brand's position and it has held up everywhere I've been. The number of same-sex couples booking has climbed every year I've been watching it.
What the brand's position can't do is change the country outside the gate. That's why which island you pick matters more to your planning than anything on the Sandals website, and it's why I'd point a first-time couple at Saint Lucia or Curaçao before Jamaica or Grenada.
The Bubble Starts Before You Reach the Resort
You clear customs and walk to the Sandals arrival lounge, which has a cool place to sit, your first island drink, and a shuttle to take you to your resort. From that point you're inside their operation and you stay inside it until you check out.
The transfer from the airport to the Grande St. Lucian runs ninety minutes to two hours depending on traffic, and it's a proper drive through the mountains with switchbacks and views. Transfers are included. You can pay for a private car or a helicopter if two hours in a van isn't the start you want, and on that particular route I understand why people do.
Understanding the Room Tiers
Every Sandals property runs three levels, and knowing what separates them will save you more money than anything else here.
Luxury
Fully all-inclusive everywhere on the resort. Every restaurant, every bar, every included activity. What you don't get is room service, and the minibar is beer, wine, and soft drinks.
This is the right room for people who intend to be out of it all day.
Club
Same room layout as Luxury. What you're buying is the Club Lounge, which has espresso around the clock, books, board games, somewhere to sit with people, and a concierge desk that handles anything you need on property. Club rooms add robes, room service from morning to late evening, and a stocked bar with full bottles of scotch, gin, vodka, rum, and wine, refilled daily. Finish a bottle and they replace it, as many times as you like.
I stayed Club on a Caribbean Beach View Penthouse and it's the tier I'd put most couples in.
Butler
Upgraded liquor, twenty-four hour room service off a better menu, and a butler assigned to you.
The butler is the part people underestimate. Ask for anything. They will do everything in their power to make it happen, up to and including filling in the last spot in a volleyball game.
At the Grande St. Lucian the butler categories include the over-water bungalows, which get private wifi and private airport transfers on top of everything else. Those are the rooms people plan a whole trip around.
Club Level Caribbean View Room
What "Luxury Included" Actually Covers
I came to Sandals from cruising, where the lines have gotten very good at separating you from your money, so I went in expecting to be upsold all week. It didn't happen. The only place anyone asked me to spend more was the spa desk in the lobby, and a polite no thank you ended it.
The rule of thumb on activities is simple: if it's human-powered it's included, if it's motorized it costs extra. Snorkeling, windsurfing, kayaking, paddleboarding, all in. Jet skis aren't.
If you're certified, scuba is unlimited and included, with the gear waiting for you so you're not flying with it. If you're not certified you can do the course at the resort or knock out the eLearning portion at home first and finish with an open water dive there.
Progressive dining is the one I'd actually plan for. Because it's all included, you can take each course at a different restaurant. Appetizer at one, main somewhere else, dessert somewhere else again. It turns dinner into the evening's activity, and it's the kind of thing that only works at a property where nothing has a price attached.
The entertainment runs all day and changes daily, from beach parties to pool games to live music at night, and it's spread across the resort instead of concentrated in one spot, so it's easy to be near it or away from it depending on your mood.
What isn't included: photos, though you can book a free session and only buy the ones you like, which is a better deal than it sounds. The gift shop. Private beach dinners with a personalized menu, which is the one add-on I'd spend on for an anniversary. Spa services, priced comparably to a ship with a fifteen percent gratuity added automatically. And excursions, which you can book through Sandals directly or through my preferred excursion partner.
The wedding package is free with a three-night stay. Outdoor ceremony, bouquet and boutonniere, reception, two-tiered cake. You can upgrade it, but the base package really does cost nothing on top of the room.
Which brings up the part that needs its own section.
Weddings, and Where They're Real
The package is free everywhere. Whether the marriage is legally binding depends entirely on which island you're standing on.
Curaçao is the one. The Dutch Supreme Court ruled in July 2024 that Aruba and Curaçao must allow same-sex couples to marry, and it took effect immediately. Sandals Royal Curaçao opened in 2022 and same-sex couples have married there. That makes it the only property in the portfolio where you can have the resort wedding and a legal marriage in the same week.
Everywhere else in the portfolio, a ceremony for two men or two women is symbolic. Saint Lucia decriminalizing doesn't change that, because decriminalizing isn't marrying. Jamaica has no legal framework for it at all, which I've written about at length in my guide to being gay in Jamaica.
My standing advice for every couple, gay or straight, is to get legally married at a courthouse at home before you travel. That holds for every destination on the map, including the ones where a destination wedding would be perfectly legal. Get the certificate at home. It keeps the paperwork simple, there's no question about recognition when you get back, nothing about your marriage depends on another country's filing office, and the ceremony abroad becomes purely the part you care about.
If a destination wedding is the whole point of the trip, check paperwork and timing months out, and it's worth looking at where else I send couples for this before you settle on a resort. Notice periods and document requirements are real and they aren't something you can sort after you land.
Over-the-water Bungalow
What the Grande St. Lucian Is Like
It sits on a peninsula at Rodney Bay with water on both sides, and the Pitons are visible from most of the property.
The two-water setup is worth knowing before you pick a room. The Caribbean side is where everything happens, the beach, the main pool, the swim-up bar, the music. The Atlantic side is rougher water and rolling waves, and if you want a quieter room you book facing that way on purpose.
The beach on the Caribbean side is one of the best I've been on. Plenty of loungers, plenty of shade if you want it, and servers who make sure you're never sitting with an empty glass. The sand slopes gently into warm water instead of dropping off.
The food held up to the brand's own marketing, which isn't always the case. Over three nights I ate at Gordon's on the Pier, Toscanini's, and Bombay Club. Bombay was my favorite, though it was close, and there are enough restaurants that you could eat somewhere new every night for a week.
The activity staff keep things going without making you participate. There's usually a DJ or a band somewhere, games running at the pool, and enough physical space between all of it that you can sit with a book and hear the water instead.
Dessert Room Service Tray Lamb chops Dessert Breakfast with a pool view Steak dinner Dinner Dinner family style Caesar Salad
Being Gay There
I was comfortable the entire time. Nobody looked twice, nobody said anything, and I made a few friends on property who spotted that I was family and came over to say hello.
The staff were the best part. That's been true at every Sandals I've stayed at, and it's the thing I'd tell a nervous couple first.
There's one piece I'd still like to see change, and it hasn't yet. The language used around the resort is built for straight couples. It shows up in the small stuff, how staff address you, how announcements are phrased, how the marketing around the property assumes a bride and a groom. Nobody is being unkind. The script was written for somebody else and nobody has rewritten it.
I keep waiting for that to catch up and it keeps not catching up. Saint Lucia's parliament and courts have moved faster on this than the resort's vocabulary has.
It didn't ruin anything and it won't ruin your week. But if you're the kind of person who notices being an afterthought, you'll notice it here, and I'd rather you hear that from me before you arrive than feel it on day one.
Which Sandals Island Is Right for You
Saint Lucia is where I'd start most couples now. The law changed, the resorts are the strongest in the portfolio, and the Grande St. Lucian in particular is built for the kind of trip most people picture.
Curaçao is the one to pick if a legal wedding or vow renewal is part of it, and it's also the most straightforwardly welcoming island in the group. I've written about the island itself separately. If you want somewhere to stay outside the Sandals property while you're there, I've covered the island in my roundup of LGBTQ+ friendly Caribbean hotels.
Barbados and Antigua have both decriminalized, which puts them in the comfortable half of the map.
Jamaica is a good resort week and it needs planning. The law hasn't changed and the courts closed that route in 2023. Read the Jamaica piece before you book it.
Grenada and Saint Vincent still have their laws on the books. Saint Vincent is the newest property in the group and by all accounts a beautiful one. Treat it the way you'd treat Jamaica: a resort trip where you stay on property, not an island you go wandering around. Plenty of couples will have a great week there doing exactly that.
What a Sandals Week Isn't
A law changing doesn't change how people feel. Saint Lucia's courts moved in 2025, and the attitudes of everyone on the island didn't move with them that week. Decriminalizing lifts a legal threat that was mostly theoretical for tourists anyway. It doesn't hand you a welcome, and the island outside the gate will feel about the way it did before.
The bigger limit is the format. A Sandals week is a bubble by design, and the bubble is most of what you're paying for. You won't meet many locals, you won't eat where locals eat, and you won't come home with much of a feel for the place you were in. That's a real trade and it's worth knowing before you book, because some people get there and notice it.
If you want the island more than the resort, tell me and I'll send you somewhere else entirely. If you want the resort, Sandals does it as well as anyone, and Saint Lucia is where I'd put you.
Frequently Asked Questions
Is Sandals LGBTQ+ friendly?
Yes, and it has been for years. Same-sex couples are welcome at all seventeen resorts and the number booking has climbed every year. In my own stays the staff have been the best part of the experience. Where they fall short is the language, since a lot of the wording around the resorts still assumes a straight couple, and that hasn't caught up yet.
Is it legal to be gay in Saint Lucia?
Yes. In July 2025 the High Court of Saint Lucia struck down the buggery and gross indecency provisions of the Criminal Code, which had carried up to ten years. The ruling covers consenting adults in private. Saint Lucia joins Antigua and Barbuda, Barbados, Dominica, and Saint Kitts and Nevis. Grenada, Guyana, Jamaica, Saint Vincent and the Grenadines, and Trinidad and Tobago still criminalize.
Can same-sex couples get legally married at Sandals?
At Sandals Royal Curaçao, yes. The Dutch Supreme Court made same-sex marriage legal in Aruba and Curaçao in July 2024, so a wedding there is legally binding. Everywhere else in the portfolio a same-sex ceremony is symbolic, including in Saint Lucia, because decriminalizing same-sex conduct is not the same as allowing same-sex marriage. My advice either way is to marry at a courthouse at home first and let the ceremony abroad be the part you actually want.
What is included at Sandals, and what costs extra?
All food, all drinks, all restaurants and bars, entertainment, and any human-powered watersport. Scuba is included and unlimited if you're certified, with gear provided. The wedding package is free with a three-night stay. Extra: motorized watersports, spa services, photos, the gift shop, private beach dinners, and excursions. Nobody pushes you on any of it.
What is the difference between Luxury, Club, and Butler rooms?
Luxury is fully all-inclusive around the resort with no room service and a minibar of beer, wine, and soft drinks. Club has the same room layout and adds a lounge with a concierge, robes, room service, and a bar stocked with full bottles that get refilled daily. Butler adds upgraded liquor, twenty-four hour room service, and a butler who will handle anything you ask. Over-water bungalows sit in the butler tier and include private wifi and private airport transfers.
Which Sandals island should a same-sex couple pick first?
Saint Lucia or Curaçao. Saint Lucia decriminalized in 2025 and has three properties including the Grande St. Lucian. Curaçao is the only island in the portfolio where a same-sex marriage is legally binding. Barbados and Antigua have also decriminalized. Jamaica, Grenada, and Saint Vincent are all fine as resort-only weeks with planning, and I'd hold them back from a first trip.
Do I need to worry about leaving the resort?
It depends on the island, and it's the reason island choice matters more than resort choice. On Saint Lucia the legal picture has changed and a booked excursion is a reasonable thing to do. On the islands that still criminalize, I'd stay on property or go out through the resort or through me, in daylight, with a plan for getting back.
I went to Saint Lucia expecting to write something careful and hedged, and instead I had a very good week and came home a Sandals convert with one complaint about vocabulary. Five years later the law on that island moved in the right direction, which is not a sentence I get to write often about this region.
Pick the island first. Then pick the room tier, because that's the decision most people get wrong and the one I can save you the most money on.
